In honor of Valentine's Day, I thought it would be fun to talk about what I perceive the Love Languages of the Gurley family to be!
For anyone who doesn't know, there was a book written a long time ago that talked about people having a 'love language' meaning the way they received love. And the author hypothesized that when a couple has different languages, they can often not recognize that their partner is showing them love. I think this is a great idea because you might need to give love to your partner in a way that is different than how you want to receive love!
Now here are the 5 love languages and my descriptions of them based on reading the book 100 years ago:
1. Physical Touch - This can be hand holding, snuggling, hugs, sex - just receiving physical affection from your loved one.
2. Quality Time - Spending time together - date night, watching a movie together, having a discussion, etc.
3. Acts of Service - Doing something for your loved one - changing the oil in their car, folding the laundry, doing that chore they hate, you get the idea.
4. Gifts - No brainer here.
5. Words of Affirmation - Offering encouragement, sending a card, actively listening are how you show love through words of affirmation.
Now with that probably TLDR background, how do I think each of my family members want to receive love?
Brent - My husband is definitely a Physical Touch guy. Now, don't get me wrong, he does enjoy spending time with me and appreciates gifts and all that, but his is easy!
That time I spoiled him on his birthday!
Allena - Here's what's funny about me. When I read the book and look at the different love languages now, I think they all sound like me. I really think I'm an equal opportunity love languager. Give me a hug, tell me I did something good, make dinner, buy me flowers, have a date night...I'll take anything!
Me with a little blue box on Christmas!
Trent - At 11 years old, I would say Trent is definitely a big fan of gifts! I constantly worry he doesn't feel enough love from us, and I'll ask him if he wants to do something together, or I'll tell him something nice {which I can tell he does appreciate}, but that kid loves STUFF!
So excited about a gift, ha!
Drew - She is like her daddy and loves affection. She is constantly wanting to hug and snuggle and cuddle! To the point sometimes where you're like PLEASE LET ME HAVE SOME PERSONAL SPACE!
Seeking attention, ha
What is your love language? Do any of ours surprise you?
4 comments:
I read somewhere that you can do the test for kids ages 9 - 12 so I'm tempted to get Sam and Rachel to do it. Rachel's is for sure quality time and for Sam, I don't know... He has me stumped. Dave is for sure physical touch. I think all men are! HAHAHAHAHA!!!
I enjoyed reading your love languages! Mine is quality time and words of affirmation.
xoxo
Lovely
www.mynameislovely.com
Somehow I didn’t see this post until today? Anyway, agreed grown men are all varying degrees of physical touch. Some more than others but that’s their main one. Oliver, like Paige, is definitely touch too; snuggles, hugs, all of it. Aaron also loves getting gifts, like Trent, but he rarely cares who got him the gift, just that he has it. I think that means it’s more a materialistic obsession than a sign of love. If he viewed gifts as love, he would be able to tell me the details of receiving the gift (who, when, where) which he can’t because he’s more focused on the collection / usage of gifts. I would peg him, instead, with words of affirmation; he needs a teacher who will tell him he’s smart and he needs us to say we are proud of him. Carson WHO KNOWS. :)
Mine is quality time-like just do stuff with me! Be around me even if it's watching TV. I definitely was lacking that in my marriage and in some ways I think that makes me a little needy as I'm not going to settle for someone who isn't giving me that attention :/ but my love language to give to others is acts of service/gifts. Just letting that person or friend know I'm thinking about them or offering to help out in anyway I can. That has gotten me into some trouble as some people take advantage-but it's all about setting boundaries. I just like when people feel special.
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